Mario Lopez is the poor mans Ryan Seacrest
Well hello freshman 15, didn't see you there until I tried on last years summer clothes.
had a guy just try to take his underwear off in the middle of the bar w o taking his pants off. That kind of Sunday afternoon
other than her wanting kids and me wanting to do drugs,were perfect for each other
Which is scary since we both think with our vaginas
good, we got high then went swimming. shelly forgot to keep swimming so we tied her to the ladder in the shallow part with her bikini top.
Dude, did you really "knight me" and tell me I had permission to bang your sister last night?
I'm not really made for random hookups.. i'm like a swan.. i don't wanna have random swan sex. i just wanna have one swan hubby and fly around the world together and eat bread that people throw at us..
I'm scared to see what happens if we keep winning like this. I don't think there enough livers for every one after the season is over.
I know we were going to go hiking today, but I don’t think I can face reality until Wednesday
Don't you hate falling asleep on the couch with a glass of wine in your hand? It's like dreaming about peeing and then realizing you've peed the bed only stickier.
When you wake up to a porn star on your couch telling you, you better tell your boyfriend about last night.
I asked for a cup of water. They gave me tequila. They WANT ME TO DIE
How does the curb feel today?
It's stronger than my elbow. But I found my lighter while I was down there.
Unexpected pro of the hostel though: literally down the street from Coors Field. I could literally fart on the building in five minutes.
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