Why would I want to inherit a sex machine used by my grandma?
so when am I gonna get some from you?
when you dick grows 3 inches
I'm surprised you like me... I didn't think I was your type.
Blonde hair and big tits is every guys type.
You fell asleep leaning on my shoulder at the bar
Every once in a while you'd chuckle to yourself, and when I asked you what's so funny u replied "sometimes my toes tickle eachother"
Pushiiing vjews 4 ma daz caik
Lyk hr kuds 4
Our idea of a "deep conversation" was successfully forming complete sentences.
she just stared at nothing and then looked at me and goes, "that's a weird place to put the wall"
Why were my jeans in the freezer of the mini fridge, and how long have they been in there? On another note, I found my teacher's ID badge.
Nothing like being buzzed at 10:20am off wine shots in Amish country
He showed up at my front door with Plan B and a rose...
Thats just a parental red flag. They have been brainwashed. Lets baptize them into the church of PBR
The fact that I am laying in bed on my stomach with an ice pack on my rump is a clear indication that I am no longer in my carefree 20s
No. Every time we go there, you end up getting high, then lost, then going home with strangers.
You squatted and peed on the living room floor while maintaining eye contact with Sebastian
Randomize
