only if we run a train.
done.
She's like a coupon for free blow jobs. No purchase necessary.
Good thing you didnt wake up last night. Wouldve found me naked talking to my closet asking to borrow my towel.
Having skype sex with him in the lounge at 1:45am...THIS IS WHAT HE DOES TO ME
well on a positive note i hear those vitamins you take while pregnant do wonders for your nails
I think my vagina is going to steal my keys and drive over there.
Hopefully she would park on my face.
People are yelling about how much they want you here.
I'm going to change, vomit up my mexican food to save the trouble later, and then come meet you. Thrilled.
Maybe her vagina is like a vacuum
I can't decide if that would be a good or bad thing. I'm leaning toward good
I told him I liked how shrimp feels in my mouth, but I don't actually like eating it. Turned out to be the most awkward way to say that I wanted to suck his dick.
I'm using my breathalyzer result sheet as a coaster for my 40.
At 12:16 am. We just got out of the truck and went behind it and fucked. With 3 people in the truck. On the side of the road. As cars drove by.
I've never had someone so bad at kissing. It was like he was trying to block my airway with his tongue and he succeeded...
Turns out the guy I did all that coke with the other night is a cop
We're dating now
You have no idea how awkward it is fucking someone with the same name as your dog
I've been trying to fall asleep with ice packs covering my vagina for the last hour... Sorry for being vulgar. I'm going to kill myself.
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