I'm sorry, but you without makeup is like christmas without presents.
So in our children's lit class, some jackass little boy had gone thru the where's waldo book and circled waldo. I realize you would have been that kid.
today i learned why jack sparrow loved rum so fucking much
After your mom took her 12th and fatal tequila shot she proceeded to fall head first into the bonfire... Guess I don't have to fear getting old after all
I knew it was on when he was dancing on stage and I gave him a dollar so in return he ripped my tit out of my shirt and started sucking on it IN THE MIDDLE OF THE BAR.
We have to have sex twice when i get back. I miss you sex, and thank god the nhl lockout is over sex. I will happily let you wear your sharks jersey during it and i will wear my ducks jersey, and it will be mad rivalry sex.
I'm pretty sure the guy in front of me at Walmart doesn't have good plans. It's one am he is buying a flash light and black bandanna
I would have publicly shamed him but I'm pretty sure his tramp stamp did that on its own...
I want to respect them as people, but really I just want to have sex with them.
He just chose domino's over sex. ARE YOU KIDDING ME?
I'm going to target high, just in case I ask you where my paycheck went later
just drove past - why are you walking towards the shop in your pyjamas?
Can't talk, on a quest for bacon.
Step one: We finally agreed on an au pair that we both wanna fuck.
Mom just walked in on a bj. IT'S WHATEVER.
Do plants get herpes?
who is this
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