She's not depressed. She's just sober. It's like the same thing.
Improvement. She went from pretending she was the soccer ball in the world cup games and it hurt when they kicked her to passed out on the floor.
Sunday is a myth, I refuse to believe that I waste an entire day unable to function after a night of drinking.
We are winners. And by winners I mean home wrecking sluts
Isn't that what our 20s r for?? Testing the strength of other people's shitty relationships?
I'm so hungover that if we go to panera, I'll probably get a bread bowl to throw up in.
Haha. I got you. I always pay you back somehow. Do you accept all major forms of payment: cash, taco bell, and patriotic underwear?
I would rather burn my vagina off with a damn flame thrower before I would touch anything that has touched her skank ass.
Exactly, there's no such thing as commitment at foam n' glow
No more margaritas for you. Also, tequila should be reclassified as a hallucinogen.
They sleep with other people as long as there is no oral. Logic and reason were thrown out the window a long time ago with them.
You need to finger her with the Spock hand sign since she loves Star Trek.
I want you to know I am at work super hungover and I threw up in the mop sink. I feel like you will appreciate this
You're my fucking hero
I was too hungover to sit up and pull the curtains closed so I did it with my toes
Did you come home, throw out a ton of shoes, then leave again?
That is exactly what I did.
I feel like a dancer trapped in the body of a math instructor. Love, Mom
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