Strippers tramp stamp says "mom"
When I told my boss I'm using a vacation day for 4/20, he gave me his personal cell phone number and winked at me.
My lack of memory is directly related to being friends with you.
either she was really happy we won flip cup, or she was too drunk to notice her boyfriend behind her.
THEY WONT LEYT ME IN AND I REALLY NEED SOME FRUIT
My dad just decided to play wingman for me... I dont want to let the family down... but both these girls are hideous
then you said,"Take this damn cabbage!" although it was actually your shirt. i found you in the elevator of his building.
I drank all the drinks. And jump off roof. Yay
She stopped laughing and kind of stared at the wall for a while. Then she did 3 somersaults and said she saw jesus. This weed is fucking fantastic.
Well I passed out before 4:20 on 4/20 so I deem it a failure AND a success.
So, got kind of drunk last night, made out with some guy, and somehow stole his credit card. Don't even know.
He gets married Father's Day weekend and I just found out I'm pregnant. What do I do?
What's the best way to tell someone that I accidentally wound up in a gay harem?
dude, shes trippin so bad. idk what shes on, she just told me she doesnt remember her name then proceeded to get in the shower clothed to try to "rinse off the high"
Let's be real, he was never going to be tall enough
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