i am watching brooke knows best right now and hulk is totally dating his daughter's look a like. it is gross and disturbing.
the most pressuring question is, why are you watching brooke knows best?.
ID DO HER
SHE HAS LUMPS OF DEODORANT IN HER ARMPIT, I THINK ONE FELL IN YOUR DRINK
I am drunk as shit eating pancakes. I am not the person to call.
Discovered the secret to willingly attending my 3-o'clock class. Ahoy, Cap'n.
When your really high you cant order into a clowns mouth
Its mothers day and I have choke marks around my neck. Thanks for that.
i cant text you anymore tonight, God gave me two hands for two cups
I'm never telling my kids not to take ecstasy, never. Idk what my mom was thinking.
I just googled if crying burns calories
I should work for the FBI. Or planned parenthood.
That's quite a broad spectrum. What did you do?
I told my doctor about us having twin chlamydia
I got so drunk that I peed my bed...and all over him. The ironic thing is that he slept in his swimming trunks.
I butt dialed her mom while cheating on her. Needless to say Christmas will be awkward.
You know its an epic night when omar the garbage man gives you a ride home at 6 in the morning.
It's a classy one I promise! Their toilets are cushioned an tier wifi is named hummingbird
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