How long do you think herpes can live on chapstick?
We ran out of things to say while we were playing Never Have I Ever so we started playing I Have Done This... Have You?
He invited you over for Super Sexy Saturday and Cosmos... I'm pretty sure that's gay
good news. according to wikipedia, my blackout might just have been "post-trauma amnesia"
u got into a flexing contest with a dude in bathroom in the mirror at the club
It just gets louder and louder too...dear god. Her poor vagina.
We need to get sombreros so I can give them to strippers.
I have pictures of you scratching against the sliding glass door on your knees screaming how you felt like a lamb.
Found out it was only pneumonia. We celebrated hydrocodone cough syrup. Two long island ice teas at lunch and the random white powder we found in her purse. Mother of the year award.
Can you imagine how doomed are children are? I mean for one they have our genetics and then we will ruin them as parents. It will be the most magical adventure. Let's not start soon, too many adventures at hand that involve immense amounts of alcohol.
I look like slutty woodland creatures dress me in the morning. Everybody's got problems.
I threw away my jacket instead of washing it, the jungle juice stained me more of shame than red food coloring... i have never been that white girl wasted before...
things were going awesome until jimmy put out a cigarette in the everclear.
Trust no bitch in laser tag. Not a single one.
Saw two pregnant women at court today and I SWEAR one of them said "we had a threesome with this random guy and he got both of us pregnant."
Randomize
