we should go somewhere reaaaaaal shady
I thouht it was time to go to sleep and suddenly I was front row on brokeback mountain
hahah your definitly as dumb as I think I thought you are. boom roasted.
so its official, girls can see a boner through my snuggie.
I got to find out the airplane alcohol limit, and somehow I made it through the flight.
You weren't just peeing. You were like grinding on it. And you tried to pee in the washing machine first.
Lets go see if some hobos will give us a prostate massage for a 40 ounce.
I mean i can't really be mad...either way i was gonna fuck him or hate fuck him, so it's basically a win/win situation.
don't act like you've never hung your towel on your dick after getting out of the shower
Why does my therapist keep calling when I jerk off?
I heard a crunch while giving him head. I looked up and he was eating Cheese Itz. So we made a deal that he'd take a hand job so I could eat them too.
Well, you started screaming "I dont know you GO AWAY" to your mom when she was holding your hair as you threw up in her garden.
He gave me a brownie at the beginning of class and now I can't feel my face.
All I want is to get shitfaced and fuck random strangers is that really to much to ask?
I miss seeing you
i hope for the sake of your safety you were not with your girlfriend while sending texts like that at 3 am
Randomize