i just set an alarm for noon. fuck yes winter break.
Whats a good hint for stop bitching im gonna give you head
well you haven't lived until you've been 86'ed from a family restaraunt
you haven't felt a hangover until you wake up after a night of snorting tequila.
There comes a time in every girls life when she must use her boobs for good instead of evil.
Your pregnant arnt you
by the way- Brandy out of a doggy bowl was AMAZING
Because drinking and showering don't go hand in hand. There that's my PSA of the day.
I'm starting to think that birthday sex is just an urban legend. Like the boogey man, and woman orgasms.
Can I put tequila in the fish bowl? I think he wants to party too
So stoned that I pressed the unlock button on my car keys to walk into my bedroom...
Also my bed has glitter in it for reasons I do not recall
Costco cheesecake and whisky. A night made in heaven
I'm saying "I told you so" now so that I don't slow down to say it on the way to grab the fire extinguisher
Is it bad when your own grandmother calls you a whore?
It's difficult when the romantic and the hedonist in me are fighting. I want him to respect me and hopefully pursue an actual relationship, but then I remember he fucks like a GOD and loves my kink. Oh, life's hard.
Randomize
