Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(917): View more from New York City

Not really fighting over the same girl. He takes her out to dinner and then I come over and fuck her. We've worked out the perfect relationship.

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(202): View more from Washington, DC

he let me wear his jacket and there was a magnum and a bowl in his pocket ... I think im in love

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(828): View more from North Carolina

you grabbed the waitors dick and yelled '2nd base' and then he gave you his number. I hate your life.

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(504): View more from Louisiana

Something about getting head on stairs. I don't know.

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(314): View more from Missouri

she got the salsa and pickles out of the fridge looked at me and said what can i make with this

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(602): View more from Arizona

I held his ankles while he hung off the top bunk attempting to get my pillow that fell off.

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(973): View more from New Jersey

They ran out of ice at the party, so I fixed my drink with frozen broccoli....the show must go on!

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(818): View more from California

My lighter is stuck in my beard.

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(520): View more from Arizona

Omg I joined a choir last night...

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