school has made you so classy.
that's mcgill. producing sluts since 1884.
You stuck the head of a rubber chicken you found in her house up your ass and then started running around her living room. Naked.
I wish the holidays was like a drive thru. Get in. Get your presents. Get out.
Woke up with a treasure map of my room stuck with sticky tape to my ceiling. followed it and found $75 with a note saying; "eat this if we're invaded"... I'm never getting stoned again
So I'm seriously debating forwarding these sexts to his horse faced new gf including the ones that say he still loves me... but I still need his check to clear... decisions decisions
Damn you and your Monday night power hours.
this just proves how much faith i have in "us".. what should we be for halloween..?
I had to break up with him he didn't understand my priorities. I'm sorry but Saturday nights are for pot and Doctor Who. I'm not going to change who I am.
Come part with me. By you sleep! No fun. Idek feelings Sorry for your life.
He said and I quote "Had to beat one off in the Burger King bathroom before I went over." Thats somebody that takes pride in his work.
I'm drinking wine from the cap of my laundry detergent container, wearing my bed sheet as a cape. How do you think I'm taking it?
I didn't mind you coming over, just I'm quite sure most booty calls don't involve a scavenger hunt...
OMFG. JUST WALKED IN ON A DUDE JERKING IT IN THE MCDONALDS BATHROOM
Stall or urinal?
There is blood all over my sheets and no discernible source.
Wearing panties to a party gives you a whole new perspective on life.
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