Saved 180 Bucks tonight. Pulled my own tooth. More money to party with.
It was my birthday today and i decided that i am not checking my notifications on facebook so ill feel popular
Wrong number and your a loser
do you think they make "congratulations unfit mother" greeting cards?
or abortion recommendation cards.
And as you crawled into the bathroom last night you repeatedly said "I know the routine".
They were like stripper heels, except business stripper heels, the kind strippers would wear to court.
welp wont be popping out a kid with a beret. frenchie is gone and the mother nature showed herself. bilingual kid can be erased from the bucket list
Last comment. I know of no exercises, diets or practices out there to help keeping balls young and healthy. They simply succumb to gravity.
time for you to cut the loving, understanding, non-judgmental crap and say/do whatever it takes to make sure I never, ever, ever sleep with him again ever
Spring Fling is on 420. The theme better be 'Flower Child'.
I want there to be fog machines and unicorns.
The amount of precision it takes to urinate into a 2 liter bottle while hammered is undeniably difficult.
I'm slightly more gay than I thought. I'd go so far as to say I'm a top.
She kept asking for cigarettes, than just put them in her purse as "savings"
Thanksgiving day drinking ended up with me in a shopping cart screaming where are the bitches and condoms. I'd say it went well.
Wow dude wow that's sad man so sad. I dno't event wanna massturbate anymore due to teh sadness
When campus security rolled up he stole their car and drove it like 100 feet. Then he walked up and gave back the keys because it was a hyundai.
Randomize
