i'm going to be honest, my vagina smells.
how do i word it so it doesnt sound like im asking him if he has ever been in jail.
They were like stripper heels, except business stripper heels, the kind strippers would wear to court.
Yeah, the furnace guy just pulled out 4 empty and 1 full beer bottle from the vent. You are no longer allowed over.
It's like my butt was the only innocence I had left and now I don't even have that.
i have a feeling i am the only one who can successfully pull off the "slutty kentucky derby" look.
Oh boy. Send him a care package with laxative cookies and alcohol. So he can shit himself while he's passed out drunk.
this st patricks day sucks
ill send jameson via bank tube 150+ miles
if you arent using your penis to save lives, then what good is it?
And you were like wow I love water shots they taste so good
That was right around the time that the drunken mess pulled out his dick in front of myself and like 10 other people and started peeing all over the train platform while saying, "Sometimes a bear gets you brother. Sometimes a bear gets you."
Pretty standard Thursday night commute for you, no?
THE STRIPPER HAD A GUN JOHN!
Ate a slug for 39 dollars
I wouldn't expect anything less from a PhD student
Apparently I have a "problem" because I enjoy doing bong rips in the shower
If you left your bike out in front, I just watched some dude steal it.
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