woke up in a shopping cart using a keystone box as a blanket. how was your night?
Oh no. He has the "I'm 30 years old and I just shit myself in public" face.
I am watching the symphony and have decided that violin players probably give really good hand jobs.
Id like to know where dora the explorers parents are when she goes on all these crazy ass adventures
you haven't felt a hangover until you wake up after a night of snorting tequila.
Two words Indian burn...
What did she think it was, a shake weight?
It was her 21st and she had one drink and fell asleep. I hate 90lb girls.
Hey on the reals though tomorrow if i take you out to lunch as just a friend will you also suck my cock as just a friend?
I'm crying, drinking alone and applying for jobs tonight. I figure the alcohol will lower my job standards.
for breakfast I had vodka and flavor blasted goldfish. and I'm topless.
Very excited! Vodka will be shot, dicks will be ridden, and memories made.
The bartender seems to not like the DD's anymore. I'm sad
he was like captain planet, but less blue and more nakeed
Oh by "being festive" I mean make tacos for dinner.
I'm fucking blazing boy. 5hr weed sauce kicked in and my entire face feels like an 8ball of gold bond flying down a mountain of Fresh powder. Just gliding.
Randomize