Did you hit it?
Turns out she was a he. but to answer your question, yes.
We fucked twice, I went to the bathroom to freshen up, and came back to him playing "Your Body is A Wonderland" on his guitar naked in my bed.
Just tried to put my sweatpants on backwards...the chances of passing my physics exam just went down about 100%.
i have a surprise for you that looks bigger since I found my body hair trimmer
I just need you there to slap my dick when im flirting with her
the only thing i remember last nigh is talking to some chick for thirty minutes about cheese.
not exactly restoring sanity, but he is throwing up on the national mall right now
when he put a condom on for a handjob cuz he didn't want to "blow his load in the car" i started to question my choice in guys..
Nothing like waking up naked and alone on your floor to remind you that you make life mistakes often.
So question, would you consider it morally wrong to grind up Cialas and put it in ones cocktail? Then I get what I want and he doesn't have to be embarrassed and he can win the mental game with himself? I'm only thinking of him...
Oh, and apparently I was butt ass naked and walked into the room where anna was skyping her dude in afghanistan and said "This is happening."
How the fuck does a person bruise an armpit? I swear to god, I get the lamest drunk injuries.
I wish more of my problems were easily solvable by taking a good long shit.
Many a woman has been in tears over the passing of my penis' whorish ways.
What happened to you last night?
SO. MANY. SHOTS.
Randomize
