Can I come over?
Can't... I'm at class right now.
No your not
I'm outside by your car.
think what you will about my sexuality, just get the cigarettes
Denial is the first step to alcoholism…and I don't hate it
I am at the point in my high where i now know/understand chinese.
the whole time he was cumming, he did the joey lawrence WHOA. over and over. WHOA. WHOA. WHOA. WHOA.
I woke up to the bathroom door of steak n shake hitting me in the face at 4 in the morning...
BIGGER SANDWIJH COME NIW OR DIE
THAT DOESN'T MEAN YOU SHOULD LET ME CHUG VODKA.
All i remember about last night is holding a bottle of bacardi and screaming challenge accepted!
We're stoned and watching little Einstein videos. Come. Over. Now.
Nothing like pulling a bottle of vodka out of your purse at 7am in the security line to make your fellow passengers uncomfortable...
As I was throwing up blood I assured concerned onlookers that I had simply "eaten a lot of ketchup today"
I just hit your bf in the face with a mustard bottle and the guy at the table next to us bowed down to me.
She called to tell me she just hooked up with my crush...and that he talked about me...not sure if I should be pissed or excited?
Haha i really think theres no better way to tell a paramedic sorry for breaking your nose than a beautiful and healthy edible arrangement...
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