windsor, ontario is like a poor man's amsterdam
no, it is just poor
you should wait a day or two to break up with your girlfriend
why?
so we can have sex in the meantime. It adds a little excitement.
you definitely made a grilled cheese using your iron..
ya and it worked didnt it??
I told him I don't date guys unless they play a musical instrument. So, he's here and he brought a kazoo.
My boyfriend just sent me flowers. I am now crying at the fact i fucked my fat neighbor. God please help me.
Found you in the bushes with fireworks, a teacup and no shoes. Decided it was a bad time to wake you.
Then she cat effected the picture of my dick I sent her the other night. I'm in love.
you're right. a strip only looks good in porn . mine just looks like a fucked up mullet
The cop looked me right in the eye and apologized for cock blocking me.
sober me is the one who makes bad decisions every boyfriend I've ever had I met sober
He's watching Always Sunny and eating refried beans straight from the can.
You know your late night booty call was a huge fail when you go back to your car after it's over, and it's still warm.
I just bought sparkling water with plan B. I am the most basic bitch to ever exist.
The logic in me says "don't text him" .But the vagina in me says "text him".
Man it shouldn't be possible to get mad while you're stoned. I feel like ive broken one of the laws of physics
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