all i know is i woke up with a braid in my hair and i vaguely remember a cab driver telling me he would give me $10,000 to get him a green card. and he would take me to turkey. and give me free cab rides. im never drinking on my medicine again. lol.
Nothing like throwing up 1/2 price appatizers and 2 4 1 personal pitcher in uniform to remind myself what a succesful failure I am
I think he just gave me the 'I used to sleep with your sister' discount
I just had someone I don't even know on Facebook message me saying it seems like I drink too much and should slow down.
Not rlly sure. Might just drink and sleep. Gotta wake up for my last rabies shot lol
just found out they live across the street from coke dealers... rethinking the new years resolution
Am I the only one that feels like there are hundreds of tiny people having a rave and stomping and kicking around inside my head this morning?
i would like you to please flash back to us blacked out in the bathroom when you told me i needed to take one for the team and have a threesome with you and jon to help your relationship. you then told me you had no issue putting ghb in my drink to make it happen.
I'm wearing spiderman underwear, the question is what am I NOT capable of
Self care is breaking into nasa and launching yourself directly into the fucking void
I knew how blacked out you were when you started doing that thing where you dance around and call yourself the Black Swan.
I'm at her wedding and she managed to get every single one night stand I ever had in her wedding party. Why does she hate me?
My professor is wearing skinny jeans, orange socks and just said penetration. I don't know what to think
Everyone has seen your nipples. It's like asking if they ever walked on grass. You need better hangover questions.
Just make sure you put pants on
....then im not going
Randomize
