I asked him if he wanted to go to my place, he said i could go but he was gonna stay
There's too many weed/neon/felt Sublime posters in this room and someone just put on a Hunter S. Thompson movie. Save me, now.
if being creepy is wrong, then i don't want to be right
My financial aid advisors would be so pissed if they knew I was spending my loan money on strippers
Downstairs neighbor just asked me to tell people when they jump off the balcony next time not to land on her flowers
I have Retrograde Ejaculation as a side effect from one of my meds. Is this a respectable form of birth control?
Where are you and who are these girls passed out on the floor?
and why are they spooning a flamingo?
they traded weed for a spot on our floor. be nice.
I can't believe you're trying to guilt me into a blow j because a tornado made you homeless.
Is it working?
We went to the casino to try to earn enough money to go to new Orleans comfortably. I'm already drunk. This is a horribly immoral start to summer.
Perfect. Let's do that. I'm thinking everclear and green dye as our base. We shud start from there
Sorry about the whole your mom seeing my face up your ass situation
It'll be a romanticized airport meeting until I'm judged for sitting on his face in the terminal
Alls I wanted was a fun New Years but I end up fingering a geico sales representative on a futon and giving her a ride to work the next morning
I think drunk me is trying to kill me.
we're tipping the strippers with chocolate coins.
Randomize
