how is it that boston is so bitchin and the rest of massachusetts sucks so much?
how is it that you still think "bitchin" is an acceptable term anymore?
i have this theory that all the people in the world who dont like mayonnaise had very bad encounter with jizz once
no i did not stop my best friend from eating out my sister...bros before hoes
we literally hit three floors of our apartment building searching for condoms. also got macaroni.
I told her we could be friends and she said the last time i told her that we had sex behind a bar at 4am
Im just a social blackout drinker.
there is no excuse for drinking mascato in your room alone while listening to one-hit wonders from the 90s
Also, beer. Big fan.
Naw. I'm tired and I'd have to shave my legs. I doubt the sex or the company would be worth it.
You don't know how skeptical I was about letting a guy with braces go down on me
I ate so much cake that I can't even enjoy a blowjob
That's the most first world problem I've ever heard in my life.
I woke up in a bush somewhere in Tucson with a full suit on. Great way to end my birthday.
His name was Dragon. For real. How do you not sleep with a Dragon? Don't judge me.
No, I'm not a heathen. You two are the heathens, I'm the whore.
not only did he puke in his mouth and hold it.. He also sneezed while doing this
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