Dude, the girl i fucked last night left wearing my high school musical shirt you bought me. she also left her panties here though.
The one with Zac Efrons face on it? You definitely got the short in of the stick. i'd rather have the shirt
fuck. yeah me too. i don't even think these panties would fit me
Just bought plan B with a coupon. Told the pharmacist I like to keep it classy.
Every day you talk to me ... I literally love you more..
There is a clear recurring theme of me having sex in restrooms that really needs to stops
His penis is literally smaller than my cell phone. I can't go out like that.
I wish you would stop telling everyone that your cock turned me into a Bears fan.
Just had sex in the darkroom, while a class was going on ten feet away. I finally have a good sex story.
Did you have ill-advised lesbian sex on the deathbed of their relationship?
Of course. Go big or go home.
You're my fucking queen.
Buying the inflatable beer pong table for the pool was one of the best investments I've ever made
Had to decide between a hook up at the train restroom or getting to work on time #growingup
I swear to go if the response she sends me something along the lines of who the fuck is Mark Hamill I might need to brake up with her.
They offered me pot brownies in 7 minutes flat. Imagine my horror when I had to be like, are those gluten free?
It was great. He never spoke.
That's not why it was great, just that's all I remember.
how do do this?
do what? Keep standing? Choose between 2 guys?
keep making boys cry?
What better than a girl who loves jager, sexts like a champ and is down for t-bell at any hours of the night? oh wait, NOTHING.
Alex thinks he can revoke my dick privileges haha.
Isn't he the one getting all the privileges ?
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