The guy asked if i had a problem w/set schedules
I sent her a Relationship Request on Facebook last night, she accepted and we fucked.. I changed my Relationship Status to Single, I think she'll get the point
I'm hard boiling eggs, drinking rum, and talking to my 8 year old brother about the 10's times tables. This is what thursday is all about.
He licked the chalk off his shirt, then spat the Mountain Dew from his mouth onto the shirt and sucked on it. And thats him sober.
This year i'm grateful for nothing other than the discovery that the uncircumcized rumors about him were wrong
Listen to my proposal.... I feed you crackers while I fuck you ever so gently.
i think he spiked my sandwich with a viagra
Yeah. I had to take off my shirt. It's soaked in weakness.
He should be castrated
Nah he might accidentally come while they're cutting it off. Wouldn't be fair to the surgeons
I'm drinking coffee out of a pasta sauce jar and eating fruit soaked in Smirnoff. I think I've hit rock bottom.
I'm pretty sure I asked his brother if he was gay while drunkenly falling to the ground.
As much as my throat was opened up this weekend, you'd think I wouldn't nearly choke on a damn almond.
i swear every fucking time i plan a party, one of our "friends" holds their shit in all week just to punch one off into the master bathroom after i pass out. it's almost like that dump you would see in a port a potty.
His mom wants to come see the dorm.
Hide the whip.
So I'm buying milk, bread, yogurt & lube. Not awkward at all
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