doug butabi!
steve butabi!
hotties wanna shake it
the nicest thing hes ever said to me is give me head.......please
I just realized I turned down a booty call too. To make cheesecake. God help us all
Her stripper name is Geico. I'm not drunk or creative enough to make this up.
My brother is wearing glitter eyeshadow and split leg skinny jeans
You've been usurped as King of the Gays
Do you think I should still be the condom fairy for Halloween even though I'll be like.. Almost 8 months pregnant?
When did we convert life to cartoon?
My father is flirting with a transexual server at hamburger mary's. We can never tell him.
I got a text saying, "It's so great to throw tomatoes at seagulls."
When nipples stop being hilarious I'll stop getting them out in public.
It's like wanting to be a vampire vs being a vampire. You don't know the cock lust until it's infected you.
Trying to take a nap and my brain decides to play "lets have flashbacks every time you blew it with a chick in college". It's a montage of stupidity and youthful inexperience. I don't know whether to laugh or cry.
you made out with another girl for some wings
im in DESPERATE NEED OF A COMPANION RIGHT NOW I’M MOTHER FUCKING TRIPPING SOLID GOLD BALLS
You're lucky I just like fucking you because you would really suck at being a boyfriend.
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