So yes, he's hot, a scorpio, an artist and a perfect cock. I think my bi train just arrived in gay town.
Dude, this chick, who is smokin by the way, has 4 false teeth on top from a softball accident that she can take out if she wants... Who's getting amazing head tonight? This guy!
I don't know whether to be creeped out by the fact this chick can do that, or jealous because you're getting toothless head.
I couldnt give him head when all I could hear was his little brother playing the piano and this family singing along to it.
Funny. I made out with his brother for the first time in a bathroom too.
Remember when you tried to pay that stripper to cry on stage?
Are you scared? I basically plan on us looking like giant drunk skittles
And some old guy told me Jesus loves me and I laughed super hard and told him sinning is fun. Hahaha
I'm currently sitting on the floor of a hostel reception area taking swigs of straight vodka, singing with people whose English doesn't go far beyond Lion King songs. I thought you might appreciate it.
From scraping the remnants from a coke bag at a lingerie party to meeting with an 80 year old man to discuss civil rights all in under 12 hours bizarrely feels like the epitome of my life
Well for number 40 i would prefer to at least like the guy attached to the dick
Fucking someone because they own a lava lamp is like fucking someone because they have 20 dollars and no concern for their house burning down.
All i remember is you yelling at a stop sign and the rest is a blur
I just found a reminder in my phone to ask you about your sex life in 7 years. So how is that going?
mid-october of freshman year. goals have shifted from "no more guys on my floor" to "all the guys on my floor."
Walking into her house she felt something in her bra.... It was a used condom. Sadly enough this is not the first or last time it will happen. It's time for an intervention.
Randomize
