So is it bad that I'm using this 21 year old for his hot bod and utter naivety?
No its what 21 year olds are made for
Gonna be late. Someone jumped in front of our train.
dont touch anything in my room. If its phallus shaped, i can almost guarantee its been in my vagina.
I just found out that AAA will pick you up if you're drunk for free if you're a member. How did I not know about this?
whoever set the energy saving light timer in the lobby bathroom cleraly has no concept how long a work dump takes
i feel like im paying for every hangover i didnt experience last year as a freshman. thank you sophomore year.
P.S. The slutty NASCAR driver costume will be saved and used year round for role play.
For future reference, Twizzlers CAN leave welts.
Yeah but I was the kid who ran over your BMW and is banging your 15 year old daughter... There isn't a cool enough dad in the world to make that work.
Is YOLO really just a socially acceptable way to say you enjoy putting things up your nose?
Went to an open-bar law school party and puked in front of Justice Scalia. My legal career is now complete -- I literally got judged by a U.S. Supreme Court Justice. Can't get any higher than that.
I just did shots of fireball with my dad in a car wash. How's your pregaming going?
do you think your dog feels awkward being in the background of your nudes?
found one of my socks in the dishwsaher... xanax
Just ate Panda Express. Fortune cookie had no fortune in it. I actually prefer this. Less broken dream potential.
Randomize
