Say something about gay babies.
my little brother just caught me blowing my step cousin in the lobby bathroom at our family reunion
There is no excuse for watching a Jesse McCartney movie.
Springtime is officially here. I just used pool water to fill up the bong
Giving the kids Children's Claritin and calling it candy.....Is it setting them up for drug abuse later?
yeah, it's no longer just 'day drinking' when it's 5pm and you're knocking over fruit displays at fresh market
I tried telling you she just blew me in the bathroom but you were too busy making out with her to listen
I did nothing besides stay sober all night, I walked home to find max naked knocking cups off the counter with his cock lol
id say bad/good trip...at first I wanted to claw off my skin... but then when i tried i ended up tickling myself for an hour.
Maybe your new years resolution should be not to fuck in Sears bathroom anymore.
If I come back tomorrow to find a certain football player tied up and locked in your closet, shit's gonna get real.
I'll set him free tomorrow morning ;)
Tequila Tuesdays need to not carry on throughout the week. Having a sad Saturday
I figured working in my office on the 34th floor I'd be safe railing xanax off my desk. Of course, I snort it just in time for the window washer guy to give me a thumbs up.
Wet should excavate the hamsters out of the front yard n give them a proper burial.
Last night you were prentending to be a broom stick...you were laying on the floor and humming the Harry potter song.
Randomize
