I think east. Tornado watch. What the fuck are you doing in Texarkana?
Bonnaroo. Tornado watch? Expand on that thought.
Watch for tornadoes.
I have discovered something important. The trick to making food taste better is not always 'more hot sauce'.
My number went up to seventeen today. I forgot to add my random hookup on a sailboat.
afterwards we were spooning and he said he wished he was a kangaroo so he cold put me in his pouch and keep me forever. I left as soon as he was asleep.
Her facebook status is 'PERCS ON DECKKK~' which is probably why she still lives with her parents.
Vaginas are confusing as hell with all their secret compartments and shit.
I'll get my vaginal cartography poster.
I didn't mean to leave you there I just didn't know him well enough to throw up in his bathroom.
I'm a lady, I can't pee on the ceiling. Even I don't have that power.
All of the sudden your world had become nothing but the sum of visible dicks. Welcome to life.
Recycling my beer bottles from breakfast counts for earth day, right?
I mean it was his birthday. How was I supposed to tell him he could not wear a sombrero while we bang.
Never backflip into an above ground pool. I think the gash will be smaller by Monday though.
Find a vagina and bring it to me. Like feeding a tiger.
You what they say. One dick in the hand is better than two in the bush
I don't want to inconvenience you with my dick\n\n
Randomize
