Laziness has reached now heights if you too unmotivated to buy pot
Come on the kid is gayer than me
Like the straightest thing he could do right now is take it up the butt
im having a threesome with these popsicles
Is it a bad that I spent my 5 year anniversary with my husband texting my ex boyfriend?
he told me it was a naked video of him so i opened it. i just got rickrolled while sexting
I Think it is all interconnected. Emma caused most of the nakedness
Depending on hangover severity. The fact that I can spell severity is in your favor.
she has an amazing ass but I need more beers to get past her horse face. It works out perfect becauseI can use her teeth as a bottle opener.
there's a girl in the coffee shop just eating a pint of ben & jerry's
SMART GIRL
im the best fifth wheel. all four of them separately bribed me to never speak of what happened last night
Ok now a guy in a winnie the pooh costume is grinding on some chick to the song shots
And after we debated politics. My dream come true: naked, just got done having great sex with a hot mixed guy, talking about why social welfare programs are a bad idea
Talking to a customer about getting high and staring at glow in the dark wheels while there is a cop in the store. Just another day in Tampa
Yo I'm lookin at the cows. They're just fucking docile things
I tried to fuck you in my bathroom while my parents were in the next room. I am a clusterfuck of fun.
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