If I had a sex resume I'd get tons of jobs.
im pretty sure there are laws against slapping prostitutes
i'm pretty sure there are laws against prostitutes.
I've been congratulating people on facebook about their forthcoming pregnancies. I can't wait to see how this plays out
I'm not sure if what i'm hearing downstairs is sex or not, but if it is, it sounds like there's a dog involved...i'm mildly concerned.
You were wasted and fell in a pond when you met him, it's not like you were on top of your game
i find it unbelievable that you didn't think it was necessary to intervene when i started letting people autograph my body with spray tan.
Is it cum slut, cumslut or cum-slut? Sexting, plz advise ASAP
I have the Everlasting Gobstopper of boners right now. It's kinda like a gift from god, but I don't want to spend anymore time with this girl than I have to.
That place is a DUI and an STD waiting to happen. I think I'll pass.
I can't feel my clothes. I'm convinced I'm naked
candyland with pharmaceuticals ... what could go wrong
Do they mail horrible human being awards or do I have to pick it up or what's the protocol on that shit
OMG I WAS JUST THINKING ABOUT HOW OUR FRIENDSHIP IS SO REAL BECAUSE I SHOW YOU DICK PICS AND WE LAUGH TOGETHER.
So this is how i'm celebrating Easter? By eating chicken nuggets and masturbating all day. What a life.
it's like that time i was drunk at relay for life. but with balloon animals...
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