There's just this way he looks at me that makes me want to suck his soul out through his dick.
I can make a handprint turkey for extra credit in history. I feel like the word college should be in quotes on the school letterhead.
Well, as a member of the greater american southwest gay community I just have to mark this as a total loss and you will be missed.
Chugged a beer while being walked to the bathroom by campus police to pour the beers out.
This is all my moms fault. She shouldn't have encouraged my weird fascinations as a child
Is the booze for tonight or the apocalypse?
Both. Pregaming the zombie party and hurricane sustenance.
Me and the cabbie are stopping on the way at a sit down restaurant to eat. My life is so sad.
I was convinced to buy a man thong.
But it's Armani so it's okay.
God I just out gayed myself.
Se wrote an essay in class about proper and fashionable winter wear for dogs. Of course I regret fucking her.
His last name was woodcox? That just screams I've got a great penis
I can't believe i just offerred a guy a burrito and head, and got turned down. Officially celibate now.
Just paid for my STD meds using a giftcard I got for Christmas. Thanks mom.
I guess you never know how much of an impact you have on someone until you sleep with their cousin
The Lion King Is on YouTube
Until 2 minutes ago I actually had a chance to pass my midterms... thanks alot
All I remember is being in the middle of the road puking and my bestfriend cheering me on from the passenger seat...
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