somethin' about having sex in my parents bed makes me feel like l'm finally an adult.
I mean we're not committed. He's my first choice, sort of like miller lite. When I'm at the bar I'm going to order one, but if they don't maybe I'll go for a bud or blue moon. I'm certainly not going to stop drinking
I'm sorry but all I really read was "my nipples will get hard."
no memory loss, but i'm unhappy with my memories
This year I'm going to try NOT getting arrested. I think the 30th birthday is the cutoff for calling Mom to bail me out.
One thing noone tells you about getting put in the drunk tank is do it barefoot. You get free flipflops.
Bro, she used the potato bongs to make French fries after. She's deff a keeper.
Seriously how many times do I have to sleep with him before he stops calling me dude
The international association of gay square dance clubs had a booth set up in the lobby of my hotel.
He's a Republican and an Ohio State fan idk how far this can go.
My brother is so high right now he's eating frozen peas and called them "fucking delightful"
I never thought my gollum impression would lead to me getting laid.
Huzzah!
God doesn't care if you're a paramedic, you can't do that to someones cat and still get into heaven
I think I just got booty called by someone I've never slept with or even really had a conversation with before.
I dont know. He's too private. After you fuck him find out his secrets.
Randomize
