Do you think people stop being hipsters when they're naked? because that's what my research shows.
I just took went to the bathroom and it smelt like blue curococo... I didn't flush yet so head on up if you wanna know what a good night smells like.
i've met an abundance of virgins and guys who where flip flops, i thinks there's a correlation
Is it bad that my only regret is fucking on the bathroom floor and not the sink?
good news: I made it out of bed and into shower. Bad news: I made it back to bed without clothes. Worse news: I don't know this bed.
This hot topless Jamaican just ran down the st with me on his back and He was screaming "I be stealing yo white ladies."
I don't know if i should be jealous or worried... or question where you are.
She got the hiccups while deep throating me. It was epic. Once in a lifetime experience.
I'll bring your "congrats on finally banging" cookies tomorrow, I'm exhausted.
Rage-masturbating and then crying myself to sleep. Welcome to Wednesday.
All he gave me was a sore vagina and film suggestions
I need two food groups: booze and turkey sandwiches
of fours songebofy did dknt stop believing
how legible are my texts
This chick just walked out of the men's room with molly all over her nose and her shirt half unbuttoned. She nodded to all of us and said "gentlemen" as she exited
Highlight your past hook-ups. You've been stabbed, shot at, run over, and chased down the road...no you can't bring new bar bitch over here!
Dude she has a friend!!!!
I'm currently hiding from this horrific thing that we call adulthood. If anyone needs me, I'll be smoking a bowl in the bouncy house.
Randomize