I then asked the hardee's employee: mam, do you mind if i pay 75 cents in cash and then put the 1.13 on my debit card.
can we please take bets on how much therapy you'll need in the future?
Apparently as I was doing the walk of shame home my dad's date was on her way to hers. hoes come in all ages these days
One of two things would happen: He'd love it, or you'd get a restraining order.
I pretty much threw up on him while he slept, I had one task today which was to wash the sheets that I threw up on and I turned them pink. I would leave me if I could
He wouldn't give me a cup of water for my bong so i sat in the drive thru to run up the timer until he gave it to me.
Update: it wasn't just our driver. This ticket confirms that the Royal Oak PD also found our behavior on the party bus to be "Lewd and Indecent."
There was booze on his face and I wanted it. I'm not sorry.
Im breaking out the trunk vodka tonight, its been aged to perfection.
I see you met someone special
i don't remember much about your party last weekend but i remember you being so drunk you were crying in your driveway about pickles at four am
only I would find a long lost relative through a craigslist casual encounters ad
I just woke up in the closet wearing nothing but a Santa hat.
that's what I'm here for. I'm literally just bad advice mixed with motivational sentences.
Who is naked dude in the kitchen?
He just fucked me into paralysis. can't feel my hands or face.
Randomize
