so... another position just opened up(704) Oh really?(704) Is it John's?(704) Or did you find a new way to take a penis?
Say something about gay babies.
I looked up to you, until I saw her walk out of your room.
She made Precious look like a solid 6.5.
well as my mentor always said, "Don't antagonize the man whose penis gives you multiple orgasms."
Did Kevin really put his bar tab under the name Hercules last night?
She put up a picture of her grandmother on facebook, looks like the lazy eye runs in the family
Either I'm spending too much time drinking or my perfume is starting to smell like a pineapple vodka.
Remember when I peed in the trash can in the ATM room last night?
Never thought I'd say this, but thank god for my blackouts.
I blew him while he was standing up and he drooled on my head
I think all the stress in my life right now can be directly correlated with never winning a game of Bop It as a child.
Welcome to stoned Saturday. Full of laser tag and beyonce and awesome
I'm going to stop at grocery on the way home. I'm CRAVING wine from a sippy cup. We have neither wine nor sippy cups.
Pretty sure we're going to get a cease & desist notice from the Make A Wish Foundation, but until then...
It was a glorious ass. He has amazing hands. I want to fuck him until he can't do math anymore.
Randomize
