would you ever date a girl who drove an 89 Chrysler LeBaron? - for the record it's a convertable
I decided that $2 and a kiss on the cheek was a great tip for the pizza girl. No one is REALLY sure how much I've have to drink.
I had no idea a 5'8 girl could fit entirely on her knees in front of the passenger seat of a Sunfire, but I am very happy to now have that knowledge.
I will fight anything that is not spinning right now
So should I finish watching Space Jam and then get head? Or get head while secretly watching Space Jam?
I'm mortified. After he finished, he turned to me and said,"So, what did you think of my mom?" WTF Please tell me he was not wondering about that while he was going down on me!!!
my last clear memory of the night was being offered a shot but having so much alcohol in my hands that someone literally had to pour it in my mouth for me. after that it pretty much skips to waking up face down and shirtless on my floor.
Every time he asks me if I'm horny I'm just like come on...stupid question
You tried to steal my pants at 3am saying they were yours and somebody was gonna die, not cool dude
You guys go ahead and have your romantic night. I'm gonna keep my vday tradition alive of angry banging a stranger.
He finally left. I didn't introduce him to the roommate. The sex is bad. I don't want him to feel welcome
I'll never lecture you, go get that dick baby girl make momma proud,I didn't raise no quitter
Drunk me left sober me a shower beer in expectation of Hurricane Harvey. Drunk me is the best.
I just set my mike's hard down and didn't want it to spill, so I held my finger up and told it to shoosh. I'm drunk.
He doesn't understand the concept of a strip club. He keeps falling in love
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