Just found out that wake n bake is not one of the 7 habits of highly effective people..
dude my 8 year old cousin is allowed to drink wine coolers. as long as its infront of my aunt. wtf
Class is significantly more awkward when you know that your teacher knows what you look like with your legs behind your head... Just saying.
just peed in the tub. didnt notice the passed out drunk guys there until a minute in
We FINALLY fucked. I swear that's the longest I've ever held out for
Umm you met him three days ago....
I said what I said
does it count as a threesome if she tried to blow the dude who was passed out next to us?
Her mom walked into the garage as we were smoking a kush blunt with sombreros on.
You came on the chandelier from the first floor.. Of course were allowed back
And know that if I ever text "road head?" that it comes from a place of caring and not a place of heartlessness..
I can't help but look at my sex life and acknowledge that this is not normal behavior.
Did he at least walk u home
He offered. I dont like that shit. I want his dick not his presence on my walk home
Last night I recall my hair going up in flames. This is evident by the burnt hair smell that is following me around this morning
My feet surprised me
Let's say we can see the evolution of our "relation" by his name in my phone. Pizza slice emoticone. Pizza guy. Jordan. Jo. Jackhammer Pizza Guy. Jockhammer pizza guy.
She was gone when I unblacked out, but she had nailed her panties to the wall and wrote “Colleen’s Dick”with a sharpie on the wall. No idea where she got a hammer and nail
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