Becky drew a cock on my face and is making me sit on the step.
what did you do that she drew a cock on your face and supplemental questions why did you let her?
Dude she let me cum on her face
You have the wrong number I'm the she who let you cum on her face unless some other girl has let you since this morning
So I missed her say 'don't' before 'come in me'. She felt what was happening and freaked - which actually made the moment 100x better.
She is wearing lilly and pearls while drinking natty from a monogrammed coozie. If that isn't a sorosititue I don't know what is
My aunt totally just drunk dialed me when i was super stoned, it was so intense
i was debating whether to load antoher bowl when i realized i was holding a sandwich in one hand and a cookie in the other. and laughing.
I.V.'s should just be available for purchase at Walmart. God I'm dehydrated.
MANGO MOTHERFUCKING GODDAMN MARGARITA DELICIOUSNESS
ecstacy + fleshlight = not all that upset about being newly single anymore
If we accept the love we think we deserve do we also accept the sex we think we deserve?
I saw it and almost just was like "Ice breaker: your penis is massive" but I didn't.
If I learned anything from that one time I saw the last 10 minutes of oprah when they talked about the secret, it is that you project what you receive back. I also have wine.
STOP GETTING GIRLS PREGNANT IN MY BED.
i survived drinking for 24 hours, an 8 ball of cocaine and a threesome. I think you can handle moving.
I got here. Mom yelled "drink of the day is blueberry sangria" and next thing I knew I was on a slip and slide.
Randomize
