The best time of year to be high is WHEN THE KING CAKES ARE HALF OFF BECAUSE MARDI GRAS IS OVER YEEEEEEEEEEEEAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHH
Are we responsible for the snowmen doing it doggy-style in my front yard?
Post-sex chicken soup was such a good idea. It's been like an hour and I'm still applauding myself
I cant feel my face. Like I dont even know if I have one. I wish I had a helmet
Why the hell did you invite him? He's gonna bring two more inches of dick and zero fun.
I just saw a douchebag with frosted tips & a LaCoste polo with popped collar driving a Call of Duty edition Jeep. It was a cavalcade of stereotypes.
We'll find out our level of friendship after tonight. You'll be helping me move a body. My body.
he congratulated me on my ability to grow long hair after pulling it to see if i had extensions
I WANT TO. I JUST IMAGINE HIS BEAUTIFUL BLONDE HEAD INBETWEEN MY LEGS AND I BREAK DOWN AND START CRYING.
Thanks for taking care of me. I hope I didn't pee in your car.
I 100% barfed while bumping the DMX remix of reading rainbow
No idea who's grandma but people were just running around naked
My dad is clearly baked off his ass. He almost sat on moms cat in front of her, zoned out while staring at it and said he wondered what it was thinking about. Now he's dragging everything from the livingroom into the garage. Moms not happy.
Im going for myspace 2006 goth bitch. Your worst nightmare
oh dont worry mom i am not sick my cough is from a recent increase in recreational drug use
that will happen
Randomize
