I think i found my new favorite workout. Go to a party where you dont know anybody and constantly walk around the house so you dont look awkward standing alone. im up to 1.8 miles
U sang "shots, shots, shots" then walked 2 ur top drawer and threw socks everywhere singin "SOCKS, SOCKS, SOCKS!"
My mom wanted me and my brother to have some bonding time before I left for school. Our bonding time consisted of us smokin a few bowls then goin to Red Robin to cure the munchies. Ooo how I love family time :)
i told the doctor i drank a college amount of alcohol. judgemental prick
THAT stays in the CAR. And if one fucking person who was NOT in the car brings it up, I will KILL you. Thank you.
..So we should take it off Youtube?
She called me her ex's name in a supermarket. How boring am I that she livens up shopping by thinking of another guy?
So i just got guilted into doing a tequila shot by a group of guys chanting "USA!" at me.
No hurry on coming over. My body currently wants everything on the inside to be on the outside. But really. Don't hurry.
What the fuck is wrong with your family? Why do you have unfrosted pop tarts.
All together there was 318 cigarette butts in the pool... And my microwave.
My nipple piercings are like the guardrails, that's why they feel so safe.
Just bought weed from the ice cream man. The kid in front of me got a tootie fruitie.
This is the best thing we've done since that time we started a religion
my alarm on my phone broke at the bar sooo i had to sleep with someone so i'd wake up on time for work.
eveytime i go to his house my cute clothes always get taken off what's the point of even wearing them there?
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