did you make any bad decisions?
many, i pretty much fell in love with a freshman...it doesn't get much better than that
Is shaving my mustache contingent on you sleeping over tonight?
She asked me to head butt her and after half a bottle of whiskey that seemed reasonable.
well, I was going to forgive her anyway but not because shes my best friend and moreso because shes my drug dealer
Shouldn't have fucked on the top bunk, I bounced so high my hair got caught in the ceiling fan and almost broke my neck.
Either I'm too drunk or she gave me a hand job to the rhythm of jingle bells.
just saw a guy snowshoeing to the liqour store
was it you?
...yes
there's a girl on facebook trying to buy me a pizza. I can't say no... right?
Apparently drinking in your car before going into a sales meeting is frowned upon. We are car sales men not doctors.
his butt looks cute in my panties so i decided he has to wear panties all the time from now on.
I feel bad cuz I was his ride home, but I didn't know I was going to have a religious experience with a guy in a cookie monster t-shirt. You can't plan for that shit.
If you come home to me in lingerie and you start vacuuming...I need to reevaluate my priorities
So you're not opposed to us ever having sex again? Because it just seems like such a waste to let a penis like yours go.
Come get me...at gazebo by side entrance....im passed out in a bush...this is a Bar A bouncer texting for your buddy
I just lost my handcuff virginity and not in the sexy way.
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