honestly, who buys weed with an unemployment check?
you.
oh yeah. preciate
i'm not the one sitting naked in my room playing with my boobs and a cat.
Apparently I promised a worker at La Siesta free English lessons to make up for vomming all over the little Mariachi band.
She is feeding us popcorn out of her bra
True. I'd rather snort cocaine off a homeless guy then work on the weekend...Actually that may not be that bad.
I just sneezed weed. Kinda wanna try to smoke it.
drunk caitlyn doesn't know how to work gmail. so know an email has been sent to the entire campus with a picture of me naked eating a bagel attached.
He was peeing on the back wall of a building. He would have been okay if the building hadn't been a police station.
Dude come to her party. Someone just took a body shot of rubbing alcohol
I woke up to pizza pinned to my wall. So that's that.
I don't care what the Chinese zodiac calendar says . . . 2015 is the year of the cock!
After we hooked up he started to cry and called his mom and told her he wanted to marry me
I mean metaphorically. Literally zombies have yet to invade. Let's be rational here.
He burst in the bathroom while I was peeing to hand me my beer I was looking for earlier tht night. And my pants were already down so I thought why not
They say you need two forms of ID, but in reality 1 nice set of tits works every time
Randomize