I'm gunna smoke cigs today. I feel like I'm in that powerful and gritty mood which requires them
I wish i could call my weed and hear it ring. That's how i found my phone.
that's like riding a pigeon when you could fuck a bald eagle
Did we both pass out talking about cake last night?
considering I showed up there after a xanax, 2 bottles of champagne and some coke, no shirt and someone else s husband... I'm sure you can figure that one out.
He doesn't belong with God. He belongs face-down in a pile of his own excrement, vomit, blood and semen. Then pissed on by Satan.
Just bought koolaid for my vodka in a DARE shirt with my NES wallet. I'm everything I thought I'd be when I was 8.
Except even better, boobs get discounts.
Bro what are you doing Thursday the day before I go to jail??
I slipped in the shower today and broke my lighter..
Um. Did you take a picture of me with a giant dildo after we went bowling?
My lease is up and I've been thinking, it's only fair that the guys I've fucked in this apartment in the past year help me move. They enjoyed the bed, now help me move it.
i mean ive seen your left buttcheek how much more bro can this get
Left him blackout in the cab, gave 20$ to the cabbie and said drive until the meter said he wasn't getting a tip.
Bangkok has him now.
What are u up to today?
Marathon sex and eating.
He was about to go in...and he fell off the bed. Ruined mood!
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