Rub youre cunt and tell me you love me.
Your incorrect use of you're doesn't arouse me in the slightest.
the only time it's appropriate to sing In The Air Tonight by Phils Collins is while sake bombing at Cal Beach
um or while having sex on a train
i'm pretty sure i lost all sex appeal when he caught me peeing in his bushes
Besides, I'm not in my 30's. I'm still allowed to drink wine from a bag.
DID YOU JUST COME OUT THROUGH A FACEBOOK COMMENT??
ive realized i need to start an "avoid moving in with my parents after graduation" fund
Can you please tell him to stop calling me ma'am? I'm starting to remember what it's like to have self respect
his finger was half off and he was more concerned that he wasnt at home shooting cucumbers out of his potato gun.
I am drunk please bring Taco Bell and sex
Never mind I found pizza just bring sex
Your father is wrapped in a table cloth singing, "America Fuck Yeah!" You are missing the time of your life.
Sorry, I thought I responded to your question. My name is Jon, we kinda had a sleepover at your friends place in OC. Don't know if you remember me, you were "dick chugging" like there was no tomorrow last night.
I have drunkenly angered a family of raccoons. Please send help immediately.
Peeing in taco bell cups is part of the fun of going to taco bell
I've also stopped shaving, like, everything. I can't tell if I'm empowered or sad
I'm officially disproving the fact that a hoe never gets cold bc this hoe is COLD.
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