I see my mary-anne walkin' awa-y-y! Bow Nahw now new, ne ne ne ne ne, ne ne nehw, ne ne new new Nah dan ah bwawn-now, ba bwan'll buh dada bwiddly doo.
That was supposed to be me air guitaring the solo from More than A Feeling
is it bad that i shorted Freddie Mac immediatly after I heard about the CFO?
Dude I think you forgot how to talk last night. We kept asking if you wanted a condom and you just smiled and made weird noises...
My mom is making me buy a single zucchini, I look like someone who can't afford a dildo
she is like cheap alcohol. you can only get so buzzed before you get sick.
whenever he goes down on me he looks at me and I just want to poke him in the eyes
I was so drunk, I was kissing everyone. Their sexual preference was none of my concern.
Seriously I just dipped a banana in vodka I really need to stop drinking
all my mom knows is what I put on facebook. So... I mean... She knows we drink a lot.
I gotta give him props though, I've never been propositioned for sex via flash mob.
Oh my god. We just got locked out of our cabin and went to the neighbor's to see if they had a key and caught the neighbor jerking it. My night > your night
Can you send me a picture of your dog? I might need to borrow him so I can wear a speedo to a pool party on Friday
He put rainforest music on before we had sex I felt like I was in the Amazon
Do you know how awkward it is to get a dick pic while working at babies r us?
Can't meet up at the party. Gary was caught by the cops attempting to drop a deuce thru his ex wife's Subaru via sun roof. Details as soon as bail is processed.
Randomize
