I know it's VERY late and i know i may have burdened you, but on the chance that it's sat nite- are you up or willing to be? Christinas camping and i'm chillin alone.
I have glitter on my penis. Do you know anything about this?
My mom asked me if I was being satisfied, sexually. And then discussed positioning.
i thought to myself 'what a productive day'. then i realized all ive done is one load of laundry and shaved my balls.
I love drunk self when he leaves a prepacked bong for the morning... in the bathroom.
it's official, i know exactly what cross streets we're at by the bumps when i give him road head
It was as if you forgot how to speak normally. All of your words came out either backwards or in song form
It hurts to peel the glue off my chest and i keep finding glitter in my hair.
I just wanted to decorate you...
Its completely acceptable to go naked under my graduation gown right?
Some ppl might frown upon it but theyre prudes
mate, my mother watched me threw up out of my nose wearing only a g-string.
Before we fucked we both mutually agreed not to tweet about it.
does doing it on an automatic sink count as shower sex?
Somehow she talked me into getting my dick pierced, weird first date.
FINALLY GOT MY TENTH DICK. PARTY FOREVER
Is it totally terrible that I just signed up for classes and already found the guy I'm going to bang??
Randomize
