Kroger has a sale on economy packs of some ridic brand of condom with a smiley devil heart on it $4.99 for 24
Sounds like a baby waitign to happen
I just spit my fake tooth out at a customer. I think he thought it was my bubble gum though so it's ok.
just stared at ed norton's ass for 26 miles. if there was ever an incentive to run a marathon, that was it. my life is perfect.
and my loofah got caught on my nipple ring in the shower today. what an awful experience.
He has a landing strip. I repeat he has shaven himself a landing strip. HELPPPP!
He just broke up w his most recent gf again, wish I could message her and be like it's not you he's gay.
Thanks for pulling me out of the bed by my feet atleast one of us was sober enough to know I had work at 5 am.
We're pregaming our midterms. Also, when we get our tests back, we're taking a shot for every point we lost. If you're not in, you should just go ahead and transfer.
Morning yack off the fire escape. Girl walking by was mortified. Gooooooooo Ducks!!
I want to be you.
Remember when puke and rally meant a good time? Fuck pregnancy
Can I interview you during sex or would that be weird?
Not my type, but the penis looks fun.
This lady gave me four cups to go along with my gallon of daiquiri. Silly girl, all I need is a straw.
I know he's not here, but I can still see him. I found some of my old stash and its good shit so its expected to see sunlight at night and scary llama men. Midgets or otherwise.
I was doing good, then they gave me free shots
Randomize
