Yes, one should always join a cult. At least once.
walkin home..,.jsut saw the cheshire cat
watch out for the queen of hearts
fuucck i forgot ab her
How long is the appropriate time period between a pregnancy scare and breaking up with my girlfriend?
when you get a chance can you look up 'free abortion clinic' for me? cuz i dont think i'll be lucky enough for a second miscarriage.
I always know the weekend is over when the real license comes out and the fake goes back into the hiding spot.
i just sat down and hooked up with this girl. after she left i called over another girl and did the same. this happened about four more times and i never left my chair
Thursday nights need to stop happening to me.
Dude your neighbors are having a garage sale. They were judging me as I walk of shamed back to my car.
He drunkenly stumbled over to me and told me my "crotch looks spectacular tonight"..... i think this could work
i don't know why he's complaining, i'm the one with four hickeys on my ass.
yeah we're all naked, and I think we just shaved Chad.
Well I just masturbated while reading a recipe for Alfredo sauce so I guess you could say I’m growing up
Had a job interview today. Walked into the room and said "IT'S GO TIME, BITCHES".
There will be plenty of opportunity for me to sexualize Mike via VenMo.
I feel really sorry for my toilet right now
Randomize
