It was still light ouot when we were walking up Pier Ave and she kept asking if she could suck my nipples.
Why did u sent me a picture of a dead horse?
i could hear you having sex and was jealous, wanted to kill the mood
And when I look at him, I just want him to say "I love you" in between deep thrusts and hard grunts.
i love when people i haven't talked to since we fucked write on my wall.
While he was going down his phone rang and he answered saying I'll call you later I'm eating.
I'm treating myself to a " uve slept with yet another mr. Wrong" breakfast
Bring a bathing suit for the glitter slip n slide
I can't turn my head to the left, I'm pissing out of my ass, and my finger went through the toilet paper today... I need you.
$645 later, she's throwing up in my washroom and asking for a cab. Hooker are soooo much cheaper.
Am I over stepping my bounds if I ask to fuck in your new bathroom?
It has heated floors
He wins the giant teddy bear for getting the neuva ring on the dick
She unfriended me four minutes after we fucked. That must be some sort of record.
Waking up drunk is great, waking up drunk and hanging with your mom is even better.
I've given up on the male species, I'm just going to be a lonely whore for the rest of my life.
Drunk me is having trouble keeping up with sober me's standards
Randomize
