I didn't say she couldn't, I said you shouldn't.
one of my coworkers is shitshow drunk, getting naked. she's about to ride the bull.
i was just going to ask if it would be cool for me to come and have a beer...
it's total chaos here. i may ride the bull... i'll be visible.
turkey basters and jungle juice, is that really the whole shopping list for new year's?
So I found "Fat chicks in saran wrap" in my search history.
That's all you talk about when you are wasted.
well shes beginning to earn a reputation as "the girl who tries to bone her hook ups in the ass with a pickle"
I feel like the devil slapped me in the face with his dick.
Birthday success
She once gave me sex advice over the phone while intoxicated. So no you don't have the cooler therapist.
Its alot like that time you got motorboated by the carni at the rodeo.
Everyone's impressed that I actually got pee all over his car since I'm a girl and they're a little curious..
I made a joke about The Hemingway being a really boring sex position where you blandly describe all the action and then kill yourself after you orgasm. He stopped responding. I've GOT to stop talking to everyone like they're you.
Turns out I screen transfered my streaming trucker restroom porn vid to the downstairs neighbors'TV instead of my own, damn you chromecast
Can I get my morals surgically removed?
I texted him back and I am so nervous I may vomit up all of the soup I just ate.
I'm at forever 21 and someone pooped in the dressing room.
she squeaked mid orgaism. I laughed she cried
Randomize
