why doesnt he love me? i have tried everything. i even sang to him after sex.
you have got to be kidding?
let's bang
You're in my phone as 'Weird Bus Guy' so I think my answer's no.
if someoen knew that someone accidentally drunkly kissed your boyfriend would you want them to tell you/?
followup question: what if both somones were me?
the point i decided it was time to leave was when i was on the floor of the bar, after taking her down with me, and a table.
You slow danced with your carpet steamer last night.
Woke up chewing my pillow from a dream where I was scarfing Cajun pasta from TGI Friday's. That's a new level of fat, even for us
you just stood there spinning and got mad if anyone tried to stop you
You sprinted into the side of a parked car
He wants to take me instead of his girlfriend to the happiest place on earth... By that He meant Vegas. My morals are just loose enough to think this is a good idea
Why did this happen to me why did I have to meet him if I could go back in time I never would have grabbed his dick
I hate you so much right now. You got us kicked out of my favorite bar because your drunk ass was hogging the Bluetooth jukebox and would play NOTHING but that goddamn skeleton song. IT'S NOT EVEN OCTOBER YET.
Spopky scrzy skeletonssz
I definitely don't remember licking the drag queens boob.
I couldn't find any flowers so I brought her a cat.
she passed out standing next to the car. her head hit the door so hard the alarm went off. she instantly snapped out of it and started sprinting away
when you come over can you bring tequila and my birth control? Thanks girl!
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